1 00:00:01,634 --> 00:00:05,138 This is what you missed last week on Shameless: 2 00:00:06,039 --> 00:00:10,310 -Dad's missing. -How the hell did I end up in Canada? 3 00:00:10,477 --> 00:00:12,479 STEVE: Frank needs a wake-up call before he wrecks all your lives. 4 00:00:12,612 --> 00:00:14,014 -Unh. -Whoa! 5 00:00:14,147 --> 00:00:16,649 -Unh. -You left him there? You get him back. 6 00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:18,618 You must be joking. 7 00:00:21,221 --> 00:00:22,522 You're fucking him? 8 00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:25,759 Frank. Oh, relax. 9 00:00:26,092 --> 00:00:28,028 FRANK: Stop! 10 00:00:28,161 --> 00:00:29,195 Morning. 11 00:00:29,329 --> 00:00:32,265 The CYO awards banquet is next week at St. Stephen's. 12 00:00:32,432 --> 00:00:35,168 -I was hoping you'd come. -Phew, can I think about it? 13 00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:48,141 [CAR CREAKING] 14 00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:59,619 [WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY OVER POLICE RADIO] 15 00:01:59,752 --> 00:02:01,754 [FIONA and TONY PANTING] 16 00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,793 TONY: Amazing. Really good. Good, good. 17 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,429 FIONA: Tony? Shut up. 18 00:02:17,670 --> 00:02:20,473 Shit! Kids. Kids. Shit. 19 00:02:20,607 --> 00:02:23,276 TONY: Yeah. Absolutely. -Shit. 20 00:02:23,409 --> 00:02:25,145 [KIDS CHATTERING] 21 00:02:29,215 --> 00:02:33,153 TONY: Hey, want the siren? Want the siren? Okay. 22 00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:35,288 [SIREN WAILING] 23 00:02:38,391 --> 00:02:40,426 WOMAN: Jake, it's time to... 24 00:02:40,793 --> 00:02:42,428 Oh, my. 25 00:02:42,562 --> 00:02:44,764 [WOMAN SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY OVER POLICE RADIO] 26 00:03:16,329 --> 00:03:18,831 Hey, that's sexual harass... Mandy? 27 00:03:19,198 --> 00:03:20,667 -Hey, Ian. -Uh, what's going on? 28 00:03:20,800 --> 00:03:24,871 I wanted to thank you for coming to my rescue in history class today. 29 00:03:25,204 --> 00:03:30,777 The colonial soldiers conserved what by declaring: 30 00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:37,550 "Don't shoot until you see the whites of their eyes"? 31 00:03:37,717 --> 00:03:39,352 Oh, shit. 32 00:03:39,485 --> 00:03:41,287 [STUDENTS LAUGHING] 33 00:03:41,421 --> 00:03:43,590 No problem. Mr. Bancroft's a prick. 34 00:03:43,990 --> 00:03:47,560 Well, I think you might be my knight in shining armor. 35 00:03:47,694 --> 00:03:48,895 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 36 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,597 Right. 37 00:03:51,731 --> 00:03:53,299 [CHUCKLES] 38 00:03:53,433 --> 00:03:56,336 You're funny, Ian Gallagher. 39 00:03:56,469 --> 00:03:58,271 Okay. 40 00:03:58,404 --> 00:04:00,707 What time do you get off work? 41 00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:02,375 Uh... 42 00:04:02,508 --> 00:04:05,745 I think it's, uh, inventory night, so probably not till really late. 43 00:04:05,878 --> 00:04:09,916 All right. Well, I guess I'll see you around school tomorrow, then? 44 00:04:10,250 --> 00:04:14,420 Yeah, right. Uh, see you tomorrow, Mandy, heh. 45 00:04:22,795 --> 00:04:24,864 MANDY: Bye, Ian. 46 00:04:25,031 --> 00:04:28,534 MAN [ON TV]: This crocodile here would be just as happy munching on that chicken... 47 00:04:28,668 --> 00:04:30,837 ...as he would dining on our croc tamer's hand. 48 00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:34,307 These amazing creatures may look cute and cuddly but caution should be taken... 49 00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:35,608 [DOORBELL RINGS] 50 00:04:35,742 --> 00:04:37,277 Frank, can you get that? 51 00:04:37,410 --> 00:04:38,778 -What? -The door. 52 00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:41,381 Oh, Christ. 53 00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:45,685 -Dad. -Son. 54 00:04:48,921 --> 00:04:50,490 I'm here for Karen. 55 00:04:50,623 --> 00:04:51,958 Oh. 56 00:04:56,062 --> 00:04:57,930 Karen, there's a boy here for you. 57 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,433 KAREN: Be down in a sec. 58 00:05:01,434 --> 00:05:03,803 SHEILA: Ah, Phillip. -Hi. 59 00:05:03,970 --> 00:05:05,872 I've made chicken Kiev. There's leftovers. 60 00:05:06,039 --> 00:05:09,842 No, that's fine, Sheila. Karen and I are gonna grab some burgers later. 61 00:05:10,009 --> 00:05:14,647 -I'll take some little red potatoes. -Of course, sweetie. 62 00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:23,756 This your home now? 63 00:05:24,891 --> 00:05:28,394 First time in my life I ever felt like I actually belonged somewhere. 64 00:05:28,528 --> 00:05:31,664 -Right. -It's quiet, clean. 65 00:05:31,798 --> 00:05:34,033 -Good food. -Free. 66 00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:43,042 What are your intentions? 67 00:05:46,045 --> 00:05:49,348 -Excuse me? -With Karen. Your intentions? 68 00:05:49,482 --> 00:05:50,650 [FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING] 69 00:05:51,350 --> 00:05:53,619 LIP: Hey. -Ready? 70 00:05:53,786 --> 00:05:56,856 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, let's, uh, get out of here. 71 00:05:57,990 --> 00:06:00,526 Have her home by midnight. 72 00:06:01,928 --> 00:06:04,097 And nothing below the waist. 73 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,818 MANDY: Boo! 74 00:06:26,652 --> 00:06:28,588 Mandy? 75 00:06:29,455 --> 00:06:31,791 -You miss me? -I guess. 76 00:06:32,558 --> 00:06:33,659 Uh... 77 00:06:33,793 --> 00:06:35,528 What are you doing here? 78 00:06:35,695 --> 00:06:38,064 Waiting to walk you home, silly. 79 00:06:40,099 --> 00:06:41,567 Oh. 80 00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:55,581 MAN [ON TV]: Tropic Thunder is right on Grave Digger's back wheel. 81 00:06:58,184 --> 00:07:00,620 He's hooked himself to the Digger's bumper. 82 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:05,024 Look at that. 83 00:07:05,158 --> 00:07:07,693 Do you, uh, want another beer? 84 00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:09,529 Okay. 85 00:07:09,796 --> 00:07:12,098 But don't be too long. 86 00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:19,472 Ow. 87 00:07:19,605 --> 00:07:22,809 -Get out of here, shithead. -Ow. Fine. Whatever. 88 00:07:24,477 --> 00:07:27,046 -You're leaving? -Yeah. Enjoy getting herpes. 89 00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:57,009 Mandy. Mandy, maybe we should... 90 00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:59,579 Shh! It's okay. 91 00:08:01,013 --> 00:08:02,815 I have one, heh. 92 00:08:05,718 --> 00:08:06,919 [GRUNTS] 93 00:08:07,053 --> 00:08:10,556 Mandy, okay. Okay. 94 00:08:11,491 --> 00:08:15,228 So, what happened with you and that guy, uh, Steve, was it? 95 00:08:15,561 --> 00:08:18,264 Those kids, they really love you. They were so cute. 96 00:08:18,598 --> 00:08:19,932 "Do the siren, do the siren." 97 00:08:20,099 --> 00:08:22,535 -So I take it you two broke up? -What? 98 00:08:22,702 --> 00:08:25,238 -You came with me to the banquet. IAN: Mandy. 99 00:08:25,571 --> 00:08:27,240 [MANDY CRYING] 100 00:08:29,542 --> 00:08:33,880 Why is Mandy Milkovich crying? I'll see you, Tony. 101 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,115 Who did what to Mandy Milkovich? 102 00:08:36,249 --> 00:08:38,251 [HORN BLARES] 103 00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:58,004 What's wrong with your mom? Why can't she ever leave the house? 104 00:08:59,138 --> 00:09:03,175 What's wrong with your dad? Why's he such a drunk? 105 00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:11,584 Is that a hickey? 106 00:09:11,951 --> 00:09:14,020 No, I burned myself with a curling iron. 107 00:09:14,687 --> 00:09:16,756 This is a hickey. 108 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:20,092 -Who from? -Ernie Morrissey. 109 00:09:21,861 --> 00:09:23,596 Amateur. 110 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,967 What's it like with my dad living at your house? 111 00:09:28,100 --> 00:09:29,569 Weird. 112 00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:31,771 It's only gonna get weirder. 113 00:09:32,638 --> 00:09:34,340 It's cold out here, heh. 114 00:09:35,942 --> 00:09:37,810 I think I hear it coming. 115 00:09:40,713 --> 00:09:43,182 [BOTH SCREAMING] 116 00:09:57,663 --> 00:09:59,298 What the fuck? 117 00:10:00,132 --> 00:10:01,867 What are you doing to her? 118 00:10:02,034 --> 00:10:04,337 Clearing the toxins from her lungs. 119 00:10:04,670 --> 00:10:06,339 [CELL PHONE RINGS] 120 00:10:10,309 --> 00:10:13,913 -Hey, babe. -Stop lending the Gallaghers our shit, V. 121 00:10:14,046 --> 00:10:16,182 A toaster? Who borrows a toaster? 122 00:10:16,315 --> 00:10:19,318 Carl set theirs on fire trying to melt action figures together. 123 00:10:19,652 --> 00:10:22,388 I don't give a shit if he was trying to melt his balls together. 124 00:10:22,722 --> 00:10:25,891 Tell them to buy a toaster. They're like 20 bucks for chrissakes. 125 00:10:26,926 --> 00:10:30,963 Maybe you should clear the toxins from her ass. You smell her room lately? 126 00:10:31,097 --> 00:10:33,866 At least I don't shit in a bag. 127 00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:36,736 Ten minutes to get downstairs. 128 00:10:36,869 --> 00:10:40,006 Why is it so cold in this house? 129 00:10:42,842 --> 00:10:43,876 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 130 00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:47,913 Looks like an A to me. Someone get the door. 131 00:10:49,949 --> 00:10:53,753 No, no, no. The bat is for killing, not for taking to school. 132 00:10:53,886 --> 00:10:56,422 I don't need any more notes from your teacher. 133 00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:01,861 Fine, I'll get the door. 134 00:11:09,268 --> 00:11:13,105 -Go away. -I'm here for Ian, not for you. 135 00:11:13,239 --> 00:11:15,741 Befriend the brother to win back the girl? 136 00:11:15,908 --> 00:11:18,878 -Is that what I'm doing? -You tell me. 137 00:11:20,746 --> 00:11:22,715 Why is it so cold in here? 138 00:11:23,249 --> 00:11:26,085 Where's my damn toaster? Huh? 139 00:11:27,686 --> 00:11:29,455 Who borrows a toaster? 140 00:11:32,825 --> 00:11:35,227 Yo, yo, yo, Destructo, that's my toaster. 141 00:11:35,361 --> 00:11:36,929 I'm trying to make Melted Man. 142 00:11:37,063 --> 00:11:39,899 Yeah, well, use a blowtorch like a normal kid. 143 00:11:40,066 --> 00:11:42,935 Fi, some flower delivery guy was looking for your address. 144 00:11:43,102 --> 00:11:44,870 They're from him. Toss them. 145 00:11:45,004 --> 00:11:47,239 No, they're not. Nope. 146 00:11:47,406 --> 00:11:50,109 DEBBIE: Yes. Four bars. Thank you, Beaver327. 147 00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:52,778 Back for more abuse. You're like a boomerang. 148 00:11:52,912 --> 00:11:56,782 Yeah, no, I lost a bet to Ian on the game. Need to see what tickets he wants. 149 00:11:56,916 --> 00:12:00,753 And we live in the 1700s where telephones haven't been invented yet... 150 00:12:00,886 --> 00:12:02,822 ...so of course you couldn't just call. 151 00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:05,357 Not when I knew you were dying to see me. 152 00:12:05,724 --> 00:12:07,860 FIONA: Shit. -Yo, got my tickets? 153 00:12:07,993 --> 00:12:12,264 Yeah, what game? Philly on the 12th or Edmonton on the 27th? 154 00:12:12,431 --> 00:12:15,968 -Uh, The Oilers. Yeah, definitely. -A good choice. The Flyers are fags. 155 00:12:16,135 --> 00:12:21,040 Goddamn it. The gas bill's late. No wonder it's freezing in here. 156 00:12:22,374 --> 00:12:26,145 "Fiona, thanks for a night I'll never forget. Tony." 157 00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:28,047 -Give me that. -Who the fuck's Tony? 158 00:12:28,180 --> 00:12:30,983 You hooked up with Tony? How charitable of you. 159 00:12:31,117 --> 00:12:32,485 Wait, Tony the cop? That Tony? 160 00:12:32,818 --> 00:12:35,354 -Yeah. And we had a nice time, okay? -Really? 161 00:12:35,488 --> 00:12:37,356 Tony's sweet. And he has a real job. 162 00:12:37,490 --> 00:12:38,524 [SNORES MOCKINGLY] 163 00:12:38,858 --> 00:12:40,960 Sorry, I fell asleep when you were talking about him. 164 00:12:41,093 --> 00:12:42,495 FIONA: Lip, phone. 165 00:12:42,862 --> 00:12:44,463 What exactly does "hooked up" mean? 166 00:12:44,797 --> 00:12:47,366 Last time I checked, penis goes into vagina. 167 00:12:47,500 --> 00:12:48,534 Wow. 168 00:12:48,868 --> 00:12:52,304 No. Okay? We're gonna have oatmeal this morning. Go get the hotplate. 169 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:55,407 STEVE: Jesus, you sure didn't waste any time, did you? 170 00:12:59,044 --> 00:13:00,546 -Here you go, sweetie. -Thank you. 171 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:02,481 You're welcome. 172 00:13:06,452 --> 00:13:10,823 And I am off to the store. Does anyone need anything? 173 00:13:10,956 --> 00:13:12,424 The store? I thought you n... 174 00:13:12,558 --> 00:13:13,792 [TABLE RATTLES] 175 00:13:13,926 --> 00:13:15,227 Unh. Christ in a basket. 176 00:13:15,361 --> 00:13:18,063 I have a feeling that today is gonna be the day, Mom. 177 00:13:18,197 --> 00:13:22,001 -I think so too, sweetie. I think so too. -Aw. 178 00:13:22,134 --> 00:13:26,071 All right, well, get me a case of Old Style tall boys, will you? 179 00:13:27,439 --> 00:13:29,141 Okay. 180 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:32,811 Old Style tall boys. Tall boys. 181 00:13:32,945 --> 00:13:36,448 Okay, so...I'm off. 182 00:13:36,582 --> 00:13:40,319 Just one foot in front of the other. 183 00:13:40,819 --> 00:13:44,356 And I will open the door. 184 00:13:51,130 --> 00:13:57,236 Open the door and I take a step outside. 185 00:13:59,405 --> 00:14:01,240 [HORN HONKS] 186 00:14:03,876 --> 00:14:07,012 [HORNS HONKING and PEOPLE SCREAMING] 187 00:14:12,351 --> 00:14:13,519 [SHEILA SCREAMS] 188 00:14:13,852 --> 00:14:16,288 Mom. Mom. 189 00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:18,624 I've got you, Mom. I'm right here. 190 00:14:18,958 --> 00:14:20,893 [SHEILA WHIMPERING] 191 00:14:26,131 --> 00:14:27,566 Okay. 192 00:14:29,602 --> 00:14:32,137 {\an8}You're right here. You're in your house. 193 00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:35,574 I thought today was the day. 194 00:14:35,941 --> 00:14:37,509 {\an8}KAREN: Maybe next time, Mom. 195 00:14:38,944 --> 00:14:40,546 Maybe next time. 196 00:14:41,547 --> 00:14:43,549 KAREN: I'm gonna go to the grocery store for you. 197 00:14:43,883 --> 00:14:46,619 {\an8}No, no, no, I'll go. 198 00:14:46,986 --> 00:14:49,622 Karen, uh, let me go for you. 199 00:14:49,955 --> 00:14:53,158 -No, that's okay. -No, no. You do something for me later... 200 00:14:53,292 --> 00:14:55,261 -...like bail me out of jail. KAREN: Frank? 201 00:14:55,394 --> 00:14:58,130 Or stop me from having sex with some ugly chick. 202 00:14:58,264 --> 00:15:00,099 KAREN: Frank? -Yeah. 203 00:15:00,266 --> 00:15:01,433 You forgot the list. 204 00:15:01,567 --> 00:15:04,570 No, I... Okay, yeah. 205 00:15:07,106 --> 00:15:08,908 All right. 206 00:15:11,443 --> 00:15:13,279 I think I can see my breath. 207 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:17,082 We need $587 or they won't turn the gas back on. 208 00:15:17,216 --> 00:15:20,352 LIP: I'm taking the PSATs for some Polish kid over on Ridgedale. 209 00:15:20,519 --> 00:15:22,154 He's to give me a hundred bucks. 210 00:15:22,288 --> 00:15:26,492 I saw online that we could get an extra $200 a month from the state... 211 00:15:26,625 --> 00:15:30,062 ...if we say Carl's retarded. 212 00:15:30,195 --> 00:15:32,531 IAN: I get paid Friday. -I'll figure out the rest. 213 00:15:33,098 --> 00:15:35,167 School. Let's go. Everyone out. 214 00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:38,170 STEVE: I can loan you the money unless you wanna get it from Tony. 215 00:15:38,304 --> 00:15:39,638 FIONA: You're still here? 216 00:15:40,005 --> 00:15:43,409 -Pay me back or not. Doesn't matter. -You're gonna be late. Go. 217 00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:46,578 Everyone out. You too. Out. 218 00:15:46,712 --> 00:15:49,682 I could borrow a couple grand from you and not pay you back. 219 00:15:50,115 --> 00:15:52,251 -This a rebound thing? FIONA: None of your business. 220 00:15:52,384 --> 00:15:54,420 He know you fucked him to get back at me? 221 00:15:54,553 --> 00:15:56,288 Get out. 222 00:15:58,023 --> 00:16:00,359 LIP: Dude, you're such a rookie. Is that your A game? 223 00:16:00,492 --> 00:16:02,528 Bye, Fiona, have a good one. 224 00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:10,536 Fi, this oatmeal. I don't know what you did with this oatmeal... 225 00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:14,306 Thanks. 226 00:16:15,541 --> 00:16:19,511 What are you doing here? Don't you have a new home? 227 00:16:19,712 --> 00:16:23,215 Wanted to spend some quality time with my loving family. 228 00:16:23,349 --> 00:16:25,484 You can spend it with Liam while I go to work. 229 00:16:25,617 --> 00:16:28,620 -I can't. Busy day today. -Doing what? 230 00:16:28,754 --> 00:16:32,324 There's a lot goes on behind the scenes to keep this family running... 231 00:16:32,458 --> 00:16:36,195 ...that you wouldn't know about, Fi. Tits, it's cold in here. 232 00:16:36,328 --> 00:16:38,764 FIONA: Why are you taking our food? -My food, you mean? 233 00:16:39,131 --> 00:16:40,632 No, I mean, our food. 234 00:16:40,766 --> 00:16:45,170 FRANK: Which you paid for with food stamps that are funded by taxes that I pay. 235 00:16:45,304 --> 00:16:46,338 [KEVIN CHUCKLES] 236 00:16:46,472 --> 00:16:48,574 -Since when? -You live here now? 237 00:16:49,041 --> 00:16:50,075 Toaster. 238 00:16:50,209 --> 00:16:51,744 [KNOCKING] 239 00:16:54,480 --> 00:16:55,614 Hi. 240 00:16:56,382 --> 00:16:57,750 Hey. 241 00:17:04,423 --> 00:17:06,492 To serve and protect, huh? 242 00:17:06,625 --> 00:17:09,094 To serve and protect. 243 00:17:09,228 --> 00:17:10,362 Kevin. 244 00:17:13,766 --> 00:17:15,534 I see you got the flowers. 245 00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:18,537 Yup. They're beautiful. 246 00:17:19,571 --> 00:17:21,540 I had a really good time last night. 247 00:17:21,673 --> 00:17:23,175 FIONA: Me too. 248 00:17:23,308 --> 00:17:24,676 I like you, Fiona. 249 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:26,612 Thanks, Tony. 250 00:17:29,281 --> 00:17:31,216 I've waited a long time for last night to happen. 251 00:17:31,350 --> 00:17:32,384 FRANK: See you. 252 00:17:32,518 --> 00:17:34,620 -Coach of the Year's a big deal. FRANK: Out of butter. 253 00:17:34,753 --> 00:17:37,156 Last night was my first time. 254 00:17:37,289 --> 00:17:41,393 -I'm sure he'll win again. -No, in the car. That was my first time. 255 00:17:41,527 --> 00:17:44,430 First time? You mean the first time with me? 256 00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,632 No, first time ever. 257 00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:50,702 -But you've been with other girls. -Not in that way. 258 00:17:51,837 --> 00:17:53,605 Tony, are you saying you were...? 259 00:17:53,806 --> 00:17:55,307 -Virgin? -Yup. 260 00:17:55,474 --> 00:17:57,409 Holy shit. You popped his cherry? 261 00:17:57,576 --> 00:18:01,180 -And how was the 30 seconds of bliss? -He actually lasted a while. 262 00:18:01,346 --> 00:18:05,684 -Did he cry after? -Aw, leave him alone. He's a nice guy. 263 00:18:05,851 --> 00:18:10,155 Oh, so it was a mercy fuck. Or did you sleep with Tony to get back at Steve? 264 00:18:10,289 --> 00:18:12,658 -What? -I saw the way you looked at Steve. 265 00:18:12,825 --> 00:18:15,127 -Like a D-O-G in heat. -Not true. 266 00:18:15,260 --> 00:18:17,362 Never looked at the other 95 guys that way. 267 00:18:17,529 --> 00:18:20,365 Don't exaggerate. Ninety-four. 268 00:18:20,532 --> 00:18:22,601 Cut Steve some slack. He meant well. 269 00:18:22,768 --> 00:18:25,104 He shipped my father off to a foreign country. 270 00:18:25,237 --> 00:18:27,439 Yes, the foreign country of Canada. 271 00:18:27,573 --> 00:18:30,809 At least Tony's not coming here getting all in my family's business. 272 00:18:31,143 --> 00:18:32,578 Maybe that's what I want. 273 00:18:32,744 --> 00:18:36,515 Tony's mother would love that. I hope he didn't tell her about last night. 274 00:18:36,682 --> 00:18:40,319 I'm sure the neighborhood bitches did. They saw us in the car. 275 00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:43,689 You did it in a car? How romantic. 276 00:18:43,822 --> 00:18:44,857 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 277 00:18:45,190 --> 00:18:46,225 [KNOCKING] 278 00:18:46,358 --> 00:18:49,528 Oh, shit. That's probably Tony's mother right there. 279 00:18:50,462 --> 00:18:52,731 Careful. Bitch might have a gun. 280 00:18:52,865 --> 00:18:54,833 [CHUCKLES] 281 00:18:57,236 --> 00:18:59,705 -Yes? -Hi, uh, my name's Abby Ruggiero. 282 00:18:59,872 --> 00:19:02,741 -Okay. -Can I speak with Virginia, please? 283 00:19:03,275 --> 00:19:06,712 -Who? -Virginia Louise Gallagher? 284 00:19:06,879 --> 00:19:09,748 -Isn't this her house? -Oh, Aunt Ginger. 285 00:19:09,882 --> 00:19:10,916 Is she here? 286 00:19:11,283 --> 00:19:14,520 No. She lives in a nursing home in Wisconsin. 287 00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:17,523 Well, I'm from the Office of the Inspector General. 288 00:19:17,756 --> 00:19:22,294 We investigate instances of, uh, social security-related fraud. 289 00:19:22,494 --> 00:19:27,166 I believe someone may be cashing your aunt's checks without her consent. 290 00:19:27,299 --> 00:19:31,703 Now, 12 years ago, your aunt changed her address to a Mail Boxes Etc. 291 00:19:31,904 --> 00:19:33,739 Twelve years ago? And you're here now? 292 00:19:36,375 --> 00:19:37,509 Oh. 293 00:19:40,445 --> 00:19:42,848 VERONICA: I gotta go, but call me. FIONA: Okay. 294 00:19:43,949 --> 00:19:48,854 Look, I'm sure that my aunt's mail is being forwarded to her in Wisconsin. 295 00:19:49,188 --> 00:19:51,790 All right, I'll tell you what we're gonna do here, miss. Ahem. 296 00:19:51,924 --> 00:19:55,294 I have your aunt's next social security check with me now. 297 00:19:55,460 --> 00:19:58,297 How about I come back in the morning, say around 10... 298 00:19:58,430 --> 00:20:01,200 ...and deliver the check to your aunt in person. 299 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:03,969 That way I can meet her, ask a few questions... 300 00:20:04,303 --> 00:20:06,572 ...and clear this whole thing up. 301 00:20:27,826 --> 00:20:31,863 Ian Gallagher, you messed with the wrong girl. 302 00:20:32,231 --> 00:20:33,298 IAN: Shit. 303 00:20:33,865 --> 00:20:35,234 MICKEY: Come here. 304 00:20:35,968 --> 00:20:37,436 Get out here, Gallagher. 305 00:20:37,970 --> 00:20:40,405 Mandy told us what you did, you piece of shit. 306 00:20:41,406 --> 00:20:44,610 -Get out here. -He's gone. There's a door in the back. 307 00:20:44,977 --> 00:20:46,612 Alley. Alley. 308 00:20:48,280 --> 00:20:49,881 Tell fuckhead this is not over. 309 00:21:12,337 --> 00:21:13,472 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 310 00:21:13,605 --> 00:21:15,774 KASH: Ian, they're gone. 311 00:21:21,013 --> 00:21:23,615 I swear to God I didn't touch her, Kash. 312 00:21:29,955 --> 00:21:31,757 LIP: Oh. Thank you. 313 00:21:32,824 --> 00:21:36,295 His focus is math and he wants to get into the National Merit Society. 314 00:21:36,428 --> 00:21:37,562 Got it. 315 00:21:37,696 --> 00:21:40,866 I told Richie that your rates went up, so he's giving you 150. 316 00:21:41,466 --> 00:21:42,934 You're good. 317 00:21:43,802 --> 00:21:46,571 -See you in three hours. -I'll be out in two. 318 00:21:50,575 --> 00:21:54,413 E-O-R-K-J. 319 00:21:54,913 --> 00:21:56,448 What do you think, Kev? 320 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:01,753 -I have no idea. -It's "joker." 321 00:22:01,887 --> 00:22:05,691 -Where the hell is Aunt Ginger, Dad? -And hello to you too, my first-born. 322 00:22:05,824 --> 00:22:07,893 Can I get you something, cop-lover? 323 00:22:08,060 --> 00:22:10,796 No. Dad, does Aunt Ginger live in Wisconsin? 324 00:22:10,929 --> 00:22:13,632 That's what I've told you, right? 325 00:22:13,765 --> 00:22:16,501 Why was a woman from the Social Security department... 326 00:22:16,668 --> 00:22:19,705 ...saying that Ginger cashes her checks in Chicago? 327 00:22:20,872 --> 00:22:24,976 Ginger's in town and she didn't call me? After all I've done for that woman? 328 00:22:25,110 --> 00:22:28,013 Oh, shit, Frank. You're cashing the checks. 329 00:22:28,380 --> 00:22:30,682 Do you know how much trouble you're gonna be in? 330 00:22:30,816 --> 00:22:33,719 Why all this sudden interest in Ginger, Fiona? 331 00:22:33,852 --> 00:22:37,122 Now that you know there's money involved, you looking for a handout? 332 00:22:37,489 --> 00:22:39,424 Well, that money is mine. 333 00:22:39,558 --> 00:22:42,060 I'm the one who's taken care of Ginger all these years. 334 00:22:42,394 --> 00:22:46,531 I call her every week. Hell, I've even visited her. 335 00:22:46,698 --> 00:22:49,501 Good. Then you can go get her and bring her home with you. 336 00:22:49,634 --> 00:22:54,873 That Social Security lady will be here with a federal agent to interview Ginger. 337 00:22:55,006 --> 00:22:56,575 Fine. 338 00:23:01,747 --> 00:23:06,885 Fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck. 339 00:23:25,837 --> 00:23:30,142 Plus, there's free appetizers, and that means it's, like, all-you-can-eat. 340 00:23:31,476 --> 00:23:34,613 -Where do you think you're going, Frank? -Russell, my man. 341 00:23:34,746 --> 00:23:38,150 -You're not allowed in here anymore. -Is the kitchen closed already? 342 00:23:38,483 --> 00:23:39,818 I'm talking about Christmas. 343 00:23:50,562 --> 00:23:52,898 That was a total misunderstanding. 344 00:23:53,064 --> 00:23:54,766 You're banned from the mission, Frank. 345 00:23:54,900 --> 00:23:56,501 [SIGHS] 346 00:23:57,169 --> 00:23:58,870 You know... 347 00:23:59,771 --> 00:24:02,808 ...the Big Guy says thou shalt forgive me. 348 00:24:02,974 --> 00:24:04,442 Out. 349 00:24:05,777 --> 00:24:06,978 All right, ugh. 350 00:24:07,112 --> 00:24:08,213 Uh... 351 00:24:08,547 --> 00:24:11,183 I'm willing to put this whole matter behind us... 352 00:24:11,516 --> 00:24:15,654 ...if you just let me borrow an old lady for a few hours. 353 00:24:17,589 --> 00:24:20,792 Wait. What...? Hold on. Just a few hours. Just... 354 00:24:20,926 --> 00:24:24,029 Will you stop...? Stop... Ok... 355 00:24:24,896 --> 00:24:27,966 I will be rethinking my charitable contributions... 356 00:24:28,099 --> 00:24:31,937 ...to this organization come holiday time. 357 00:24:39,945 --> 00:24:42,747 MAN: Hey, what the fuck? -Shut the fuck up. 358 00:24:55,727 --> 00:24:57,929 Mandy. Mandy. Hey. 359 00:24:58,063 --> 00:25:01,900 -Get away from me, you perv. -You tell your brothers I attacked you? 360 00:25:02,067 --> 00:25:05,136 If you don't get away from me, Ian Gallagher, I'll scream. 361 00:25:05,637 --> 00:25:07,672 Tell them the truth. They're gonna kill me. 362 00:25:07,839 --> 00:25:09,708 -Good. -Mandy. 363 00:25:11,843 --> 00:25:13,945 Yeah, thank you. Have a good day. 364 00:25:15,847 --> 00:25:18,884 I got you, sir. Have a good day. 365 00:25:19,050 --> 00:25:21,152 Uh, medium burger with fries. Next. 366 00:25:21,286 --> 00:25:25,590 -I'll get the, uh, chicken burrito special. -What are you doing here? 367 00:25:25,724 --> 00:25:27,959 I thought this was a food truck. I have it wrong? 368 00:25:28,093 --> 00:25:31,696 -Are you stalking me? -If wanting a burrito is stalking, I am. 369 00:25:31,863 --> 00:25:33,164 Not interested. Who's next? 370 00:25:33,298 --> 00:25:36,034 One mistake and now you want nothing to do with me. 371 00:25:36,201 --> 00:25:38,770 One mistake? You kidnapped my father. 372 00:25:38,937 --> 00:25:40,906 -I was trying to help. -Don't. 373 00:25:41,072 --> 00:25:43,975 -I've apologized. Isn't that enough? -Leave me alone. 374 00:25:44,109 --> 00:25:48,179 Listen, you would not be so pissed off if you didn't care. 375 00:25:49,581 --> 00:25:51,149 You know nothing about me. 376 00:25:51,316 --> 00:25:53,685 Then teach me. 377 00:25:56,021 --> 00:25:57,689 Teach me. 378 00:26:02,327 --> 00:26:04,930 Here's your burrito. Six-fifty. 379 00:26:07,732 --> 00:26:10,001 -Hey, keep the change. -No, thanks. 380 00:26:10,168 --> 00:26:12,304 Believe me, you need it more than I do. 381 00:26:16,107 --> 00:26:19,010 An hour and 54 minutes. Now, that's a record. 382 00:26:19,144 --> 00:26:22,981 Yes. Now all we have to do is figure out how I can go back the same day... 383 00:26:23,114 --> 00:26:25,817 ...and take it again for another kid. 384 00:26:25,951 --> 00:26:26,985 Uh-oh. 385 00:26:27,786 --> 00:26:30,322 -Hey, yo. -What do they want? 386 00:26:30,655 --> 00:26:32,724 He probably just wants to ask me out again. 387 00:26:32,857 --> 00:26:35,794 -You're not interested? -If you like the smell of cow shit. 388 00:26:36,161 --> 00:26:37,796 [KAREN CHUCKLES] 389 00:26:38,363 --> 00:26:40,799 Got a B-plus on that paper you wrote for me. 390 00:26:40,966 --> 00:26:43,268 Spread the word. I could use the business. 391 00:26:43,635 --> 00:26:46,972 -Heard they're letting Iggy out of juvie. -My mom drove up to get him. 392 00:26:47,105 --> 00:26:49,107 Throwing a party for him this weekend. 393 00:26:49,274 --> 00:26:52,944 -He'll probably be back in before then. -Ha, ha, probably. 394 00:26:54,679 --> 00:26:56,715 So Ian messed with Mandy. 395 00:26:56,881 --> 00:26:58,116 -Ian? -Yeah. 396 00:26:58,249 --> 00:27:00,852 That's, uh, highly unlikely. 397 00:27:00,986 --> 00:27:02,988 That's what Mandy told us. 398 00:27:03,154 --> 00:27:04,889 Trust me, you got the wrong guy. 399 00:27:05,056 --> 00:27:07,993 Right, the problem is that Ian's been avoiding us all day... 400 00:27:08,126 --> 00:27:09,828 ...and, uh... 401 00:27:09,961 --> 00:27:12,731 ...someone's gotta get a beatdown till we find him. 402 00:27:13,298 --> 00:27:15,066 Could make an exception. 403 00:27:15,233 --> 00:27:17,302 Not really, though. 404 00:27:22,173 --> 00:27:25,343 Well, maybe, uh, Mandy's confusing Ian... 405 00:27:25,677 --> 00:27:29,681 ...with any one of the other 400 dudes in the 10th grade she's already blown. 406 00:27:33,184 --> 00:27:36,921 [ALL GRUNTING] 407 00:27:41,126 --> 00:27:42,260 [DOOR OPENS] 408 00:27:42,394 --> 00:27:47,699 Hey, hey, hey, look who it is. Fiona. And Liam. Come say hello to me, son. 409 00:27:47,832 --> 00:27:48,967 What are you doing here? 410 00:27:49,100 --> 00:27:51,069 I went to get Ginger like you told me to. 411 00:27:51,236 --> 00:27:52,971 [SNORING] 412 00:27:53,104 --> 00:27:56,007 -This is Aunt Ginger? -In the flesh. 413 00:27:56,741 --> 00:27:59,010 Ginger has a hard-on. 414 00:28:01,112 --> 00:28:03,782 FRANK: She was born with a large clitoris. 415 00:28:03,915 --> 00:28:06,051 [MUMBLES] 416 00:28:06,184 --> 00:28:08,720 As kids, we were told to keep our hugs brief. 417 00:28:09,421 --> 00:28:11,289 It's me, the virgin. 418 00:28:11,423 --> 00:28:15,026 Oh. Heh, not anymore. Remember the car? Come on outside. 419 00:28:17,028 --> 00:28:19,798 You were right. Sorry. I should have told you beforehand. 420 00:28:19,931 --> 00:28:21,766 Little heads-up would have been nice. 421 00:28:21,900 --> 00:28:24,035 It's not the kind of thing you tell everyone. 422 00:28:24,169 --> 00:28:26,438 I was afraid you wouldn't do it if you knew. 423 00:28:26,771 --> 00:28:30,742 I probably wouldn't have. It's a big thing. 424 00:28:31,109 --> 00:28:32,777 It's above average, heh. 425 00:28:33,478 --> 00:28:37,115 It's weird I didn't have sex till now, but it's not from a lack of trying. 426 00:28:37,248 --> 00:28:40,185 Joanie wanted to wait, then she gave it up to Dicky Dolan... 427 00:28:40,318 --> 00:28:42,787 ...night before he shipped out for Fallujah, lost his leg. 428 00:28:42,921 --> 00:28:46,458 Uh, I almost did it with Houlie's sister, but she was too drunk. 429 00:28:46,791 --> 00:28:49,194 Katie was Catholic so she only let me stick it in... 430 00:28:49,327 --> 00:28:51,963 -Okay, okay, I get it. -Hey. Hey. Uh... 431 00:28:52,097 --> 00:28:53,732 My mom heard about us. 432 00:28:54,365 --> 00:28:57,202 -What? -The women in the neighborhood talk. 433 00:28:57,335 --> 00:29:00,472 She invited you to dinner tomorrow night. 434 00:29:00,805 --> 00:29:01,840 [CHUCKLES] 435 00:29:01,973 --> 00:29:03,141 I find that hard to believe. 436 00:29:04,142 --> 00:29:08,747 Okay, maybe she's not that enthusiastic about it, but I told her you were coming. 437 00:29:10,081 --> 00:29:11,750 Let me think about it. 438 00:29:12,183 --> 00:29:14,119 Sure. Absolutely. Just, uh... 439 00:29:15,186 --> 00:29:16,287 Just show up at 7? 440 00:29:17,355 --> 00:29:19,090 All right. 441 00:29:20,325 --> 00:29:25,063 You don't have to run away from me, Fiona. I get you. I get your family. 442 00:29:25,196 --> 00:29:29,200 Miss Lisa married us at the Little Red School House when we were 5? 443 00:29:29,334 --> 00:29:32,036 That's gotta count for something, right? 444 00:29:32,170 --> 00:29:35,373 Hey, Lip, there a body on the other end of that? 445 00:29:35,507 --> 00:29:38,343 -No, it's cool, Tony. -Jesus, what the hell, Lip? 446 00:29:47,452 --> 00:29:49,120 TONY: Uh... 447 00:29:50,421 --> 00:29:52,257 I'll see you. 448 00:29:52,791 --> 00:29:55,093 The nose is the most commonly broken bone... 449 00:29:55,226 --> 00:29:58,296 ...in boys between the ages of 13 and 25. 450 00:29:58,429 --> 00:30:00,498 That's fascinating, but who's the old dude? 451 00:30:00,832 --> 00:30:04,402 -It's not a dude. It's your Aunt Ginger. -What, the one who owns the house? 452 00:30:04,536 --> 00:30:08,840 That's right. Ginger, say hello to your nephew. 453 00:30:09,007 --> 00:30:10,408 Dad, stop. 454 00:30:10,542 --> 00:30:13,178 Why is he trying to pass off Mr. Perry as Aunt Ginger? 455 00:30:14,045 --> 00:30:16,214 -Who? -Mr. Perry, my old bus driver. 456 00:30:16,347 --> 00:30:18,416 Sleeps behind the dumpster over at the AandP. 457 00:30:18,550 --> 00:30:23,054 Social Security wants to talk to Ginger and he was too lazy to get the real one. 458 00:30:23,221 --> 00:30:25,190 -That's retardedly brilliant. -Thank you. 459 00:30:25,323 --> 00:30:27,458 -Or brilliantly retarded. -Thank you. 460 00:30:27,592 --> 00:30:29,961 Now we have to drive all night to go get her. 461 00:30:30,161 --> 00:30:33,298 -Think Kev will let us borrow his car? -No. 462 00:30:33,431 --> 00:30:35,567 I'll call and beg. 463 00:30:35,900 --> 00:30:38,269 We got these from Imelda over at the Holiday Inn. 464 00:30:38,403 --> 00:30:41,039 It'll be a good way to stay warm. 465 00:30:42,073 --> 00:30:43,908 Why's Mr. Perry here? 466 00:30:44,042 --> 00:30:45,243 FIONA: Hey, Kev, it's me. 467 00:30:45,376 --> 00:30:50,548 Uh, can I borrow your car just for the night? I just need to... 468 00:30:50,882 --> 00:30:52,183 You won't need the car. 469 00:30:52,350 --> 00:30:54,252 How are we gonna get Ginger? 470 00:30:54,419 --> 00:30:55,887 She's dead. 471 00:30:56,054 --> 00:30:57,956 -What? DEBBIE: Who's dead? 472 00:30:58,122 --> 00:31:01,159 LIP: Aunt Ginger. -No. 473 00:31:01,292 --> 00:31:04,495 LIP: Debs, you never met her. -And now I never will. 474 00:31:04,863 --> 00:31:08,132 Don't give me a hard time. I've been very upset about this. 475 00:31:08,266 --> 00:31:09,934 I'm in mourning. 476 00:31:10,068 --> 00:31:11,903 When did she die? 477 00:31:13,471 --> 00:31:14,939 Hmm... 478 00:31:15,073 --> 00:31:17,208 Twelve years ago. 479 00:31:18,343 --> 00:31:20,411 [GRUNTS] 480 00:31:36,995 --> 00:31:40,031 I was trying to protect you all from the trauma. 481 00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:43,101 FIONA: Shit. 482 00:31:43,234 --> 00:31:47,305 How do you think I feel? That woman was my heart and soul. 483 00:31:47,438 --> 00:31:49,374 She practically raised me. 484 00:31:49,507 --> 00:31:53,177 Dad, you've been cashing her checks. That's a felony. 485 00:31:53,311 --> 00:31:55,613 We're living in her house. Was there even a will? 486 00:31:55,947 --> 00:31:59,651 You don't need a will if she's not technically dead. 487 00:32:00,451 --> 00:32:05,123 Yes, she is technically dead, Dad. Dead is dead. 488 00:32:05,256 --> 00:32:08,092 Just because you haven't told anybody that she's dead... 489 00:32:08,259 --> 00:32:10,261 ...doesn't make her not dead. 490 00:32:10,428 --> 00:32:12,030 Fuck. 491 00:32:12,196 --> 00:32:14,065 What are we gonna do now? 492 00:32:15,300 --> 00:32:17,201 Well... 493 00:32:25,443 --> 00:32:26,477 VERONICA: Oh. 494 00:32:26,611 --> 00:32:29,380 Mrs. Sullivan is 92, but she's about to go any minute. 495 00:32:31,316 --> 00:32:35,219 Helen, she needs meds every four hours, so she's a hassle. 496 00:32:41,326 --> 00:32:45,163 Beatrice. Her son visits daily. 497 00:32:45,964 --> 00:32:49,267 Jenny, she's a favorite. The others would notice if she were missing. 498 00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,736 That's too bad. She's hot. 499 00:32:56,074 --> 00:32:57,442 I like that one. 500 00:32:58,009 --> 00:33:00,645 -Debbie. -No, too lucid. 501 00:33:01,612 --> 00:33:04,048 You know Sophie's nana, who couldn't remember... 502 00:33:04,182 --> 00:33:06,150 ...because she had old people's disease? 503 00:33:06,317 --> 00:33:08,386 -Alzheimer's? FIONA: Yeah. 504 00:33:10,154 --> 00:33:12,223 Yeah, we're looking for somebody like that. 505 00:33:16,094 --> 00:33:19,230 For the record, I do not want to be sent to a place like this. 506 00:33:19,397 --> 00:33:21,366 Don't worry, you'll outlive us all. 507 00:33:22,433 --> 00:33:25,370 You're not gonna get fired for letting us borrow an old lady? 508 00:33:25,503 --> 00:33:29,040 VERONICA: Girl, please. This place is just like what you see on the news. 509 00:33:29,173 --> 00:33:32,777 One of the night shift guys got caught fucking Mrs. Hebert, who's in a coma... 510 00:33:33,144 --> 00:33:35,013 ...he just got a raise. 511 00:33:35,179 --> 00:33:38,416 -Maybe it's from some foreign... -What about her? 512 00:33:41,019 --> 00:33:44,122 I wanna learn... How about... Did you ever hear anything so...? 513 00:33:44,255 --> 00:33:45,289 Yes. 514 00:33:48,126 --> 00:33:50,228 MICKEY: Where's fire crotch? 515 00:33:51,763 --> 00:33:53,531 Hey. 516 00:33:53,698 --> 00:33:56,100 Kash and Grab. 517 00:33:56,267 --> 00:33:58,503 He's only making it worse. 518 00:33:58,669 --> 00:34:02,774 Okay. Okay. We're gonna find him. 519 00:34:03,107 --> 00:34:06,144 Hey, Kash and Grab. Tomorrow. 520 00:34:06,277 --> 00:34:09,714 -When your shit-hole opens. MAN: We'll call you. 521 00:34:10,048 --> 00:34:11,516 They're leaving. 522 00:34:12,417 --> 00:34:14,685 IAN: This wouldn't be happening if I had sex with her. 523 00:34:15,053 --> 00:34:18,089 -You can't be what you're not, Ian, heh. -Shut up, you are. 524 00:34:18,256 --> 00:34:20,491 I didn't know what I was until after I married. 525 00:34:20,658 --> 00:34:23,795 Yeah, well, from now on, I'm just gonna be straight. 526 00:34:24,495 --> 00:34:26,230 It's not that easy. 527 00:34:26,397 --> 00:34:27,832 You do it. 528 00:34:28,166 --> 00:34:31,803 Because I love my kids. Don't complicate things for yourself. 529 00:34:34,405 --> 00:34:35,573 Now get up here. They're gone. 530 00:34:35,706 --> 00:34:37,708 [ENGINE REVS AND IAN GRUNTS] 531 00:34:53,825 --> 00:34:56,260 Oh, my goodness. 532 00:34:56,427 --> 00:34:58,596 -What's wrong? -Nothing. 533 00:34:58,729 --> 00:35:02,433 Everything is just the way I remember it. 534 00:35:02,567 --> 00:35:04,869 We kept the house exactly the same, Aunt Ginger. 535 00:35:05,203 --> 00:35:06,237 Oh. 536 00:35:06,370 --> 00:35:08,172 I can see that, dear. 537 00:35:08,306 --> 00:35:13,111 Oh, look, there's the bookcase my brother Norman built. 538 00:35:13,244 --> 00:35:15,646 Do you want me to show you to your room, Aunt Ginger? 539 00:35:15,780 --> 00:35:17,215 That would be wonderful. 540 00:35:17,381 --> 00:35:21,452 And after I wash up, why don't I make us all some nice supper. 541 00:35:21,586 --> 00:35:22,854 Okay. 542 00:35:24,188 --> 00:35:25,623 PERRY: Hey. 543 00:35:27,225 --> 00:35:29,193 Uh, where am I? 544 00:35:29,360 --> 00:35:31,562 -Dad? FRANK: I'm on it. Let's go, Perry. 545 00:35:39,137 --> 00:35:40,605 FRANK: Thanks. 546 00:36:15,206 --> 00:36:16,507 Hey. 547 00:36:20,811 --> 00:36:23,781 Put your arm around, please. Now smile. 548 00:36:56,847 --> 00:37:01,919 I was 26 and I was working as a secretary for the USO... 549 00:37:02,253 --> 00:37:05,556 ...and one of the dancers broke her foot. 550 00:37:05,690 --> 00:37:09,994 And before you know it, they're pulling me off the typewriter... 551 00:37:10,328 --> 00:37:15,633 ...and they're teaching me the dance steps for the show that very night. 552 00:37:15,766 --> 00:37:20,605 Oh, from that point forward, I was a regular dancer. 553 00:37:20,738 --> 00:37:23,374 Did you ever dance with anyone famous? 554 00:37:23,507 --> 00:37:26,644 Dance? No, honey, I'm not a dancer. 555 00:37:27,011 --> 00:37:28,980 Let's see what's on now. 556 00:37:38,756 --> 00:37:41,025 -Yeah? -Is Ian here? 557 00:37:41,359 --> 00:37:42,660 Upstairs. 558 00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:46,864 Give him these, would you? 559 00:37:49,667 --> 00:37:50,801 Okay. 560 00:38:00,678 --> 00:38:04,382 Well, if you need me, I'll be across the street in the bushes stalking you. 561 00:38:07,752 --> 00:38:09,553 I saw you smile. 562 00:38:10,521 --> 00:38:13,324 Hey. Yeah, you. You, uh, see Ian in there? 563 00:38:13,457 --> 00:38:15,059 Not home. 564 00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:17,361 MICKEY: You know when he's coming back? 565 00:38:17,628 --> 00:38:18,729 STEVE: No, man, not a clue. 566 00:38:20,731 --> 00:38:22,066 All right, fuckhead. 567 00:38:22,733 --> 00:38:25,770 Hey, Lip. How's your lip? 568 00:38:25,903 --> 00:38:29,640 Yeah, I saw you up there. Tell your shithead brother we're waiting for him. 569 00:38:29,774 --> 00:38:31,409 Sorry your face got busted up. 570 00:38:33,077 --> 00:38:34,679 It's okay. 571 00:38:35,713 --> 00:38:37,548 I didn't do anything to Mandy. 572 00:38:37,682 --> 00:38:40,885 I know that, Ian, but her brothers think you did. 573 00:38:41,852 --> 00:38:47,058 I mean, she tried to rape me, and I pushed her off, and now she's mad. 574 00:38:48,426 --> 00:38:51,829 You're probably the first guy in her life who hasn't tried to jump her. 575 00:38:52,697 --> 00:38:54,899 She started screaming and crying. 576 00:38:58,336 --> 00:39:02,673 Maybe you should throw it in her, you know? 577 00:39:02,807 --> 00:39:04,742 She'll call off her brothers off. 578 00:39:04,875 --> 00:39:09,513 Yeah. Yeah, and maybe, uh, you should throw it in Kash, right? 579 00:39:10,781 --> 00:39:12,850 -Why, is he asking about me? -Yeah. 580 00:39:13,017 --> 00:39:15,953 He's trying to go through all the Gallagher brothers. 581 00:39:17,521 --> 00:39:20,591 -Cool. -Heh. 582 00:39:31,135 --> 00:39:34,605 Eventually, you're gonna have to take the beatdown for this, you know. 583 00:39:36,874 --> 00:39:38,709 Yeah. 584 00:39:38,843 --> 00:39:40,010 I know. 585 00:39:42,580 --> 00:39:44,849 [GRUNTS] 586 00:40:57,555 --> 00:40:59,223 Smells good. 587 00:41:01,725 --> 00:41:04,495 I've missed you, Ginger. 588 00:41:06,730 --> 00:41:08,132 LIP: Yo, bud. CARL: Yeah? 589 00:41:08,466 --> 00:41:09,867 -You take the killing bat? -No. 590 00:41:10,034 --> 00:41:12,470 Bread. We're making eggs Benedict, Lip. 591 00:41:12,603 --> 00:41:14,104 Oh, great. 592 00:41:15,139 --> 00:41:18,008 That woman will be here in 45 minutes. You better be ready. 593 00:41:18,142 --> 00:41:21,479 I pay that bureaucratic no-nothing her salary. 594 00:41:21,612 --> 00:41:23,647 I'll be ready when I say I'm ready. 595 00:41:23,814 --> 00:41:25,649 Eat some breakfast, Lip. 596 00:41:25,816 --> 00:41:27,818 I gotta go, but save some for me, Debs. 597 00:41:27,952 --> 00:41:29,487 Yeah, okay. 598 00:41:29,820 --> 00:41:33,524 It's essential that families share meals together. 599 00:41:35,559 --> 00:41:37,561 Oh, don't. Oh. 600 00:41:38,629 --> 00:41:41,499 Mm. Mm. 601 00:41:41,632 --> 00:41:43,934 -That's great, Debs. DEBBIE: Thanks. 602 00:41:45,002 --> 00:41:46,837 [MICROWAVE BEEPS] 603 00:41:53,844 --> 00:41:56,780 -Who's that? -That's my dad. 604 00:42:03,554 --> 00:42:04,588 [IAN GASPS] 605 00:42:04,722 --> 00:42:06,123 Shit. 606 00:42:06,690 --> 00:42:08,259 Jesus. 607 00:42:09,960 --> 00:42:11,128 So, what's the plan? 608 00:42:11,262 --> 00:42:13,864 Hit Mickey over the head when he comes out. 609 00:42:13,998 --> 00:42:15,599 What about the other brothers? 610 00:42:15,766 --> 00:42:17,868 They'll probably beat me to death. 611 00:42:18,002 --> 00:42:19,203 [LIP GRUNTS] 612 00:42:19,537 --> 00:42:23,274 -I'll fight them off while you run. -This is my problem, all right, not yours. 613 00:42:23,641 --> 00:42:26,176 It'll be fun. I owe them one, heh. 614 00:42:28,245 --> 00:42:29,880 [DOOR OPENS] 615 00:42:31,982 --> 00:42:33,017 [DOOR CLOSES] 616 00:42:33,150 --> 00:42:34,184 Shit. 617 00:42:42,660 --> 00:42:45,629 Mandy. Mandy. Hey. 618 00:42:45,763 --> 00:42:48,299 -Get away from me, you fucking perv. -We need to talk. 619 00:42:48,632 --> 00:42:52,603 You are a dead man, Ian Gallagher. Fucking dead. 620 00:42:54,104 --> 00:42:55,239 I'm gay. 621 00:43:03,247 --> 00:43:07,618 OLD WOMAN: Linseed oil works the best on maple furniture. 622 00:43:07,751 --> 00:43:12,156 -Linseed oil, maple, got it. -You got it, sweetheart. 623 00:43:12,323 --> 00:43:13,991 We should never send her back. 624 00:43:14,124 --> 00:43:15,192 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 625 00:43:21,031 --> 00:43:23,267 ABBY: Miss Gallagher, this is Federal Agent Salinger. 626 00:43:23,601 --> 00:43:26,136 FIONA: Right on time. Come on in. 627 00:43:47,758 --> 00:43:50,094 Mrs. Gallagher. 628 00:43:50,260 --> 00:43:54,665 My name is Abby and I'd like to ask you a few questions. 629 00:43:54,798 --> 00:44:00,371 My name is Abby and I'd like to ask you a few questions. 630 00:44:08,912 --> 00:44:13,017 Mrs. Gallagher, how old are you? 631 00:44:15,019 --> 00:44:17,388 I don't remember. 632 00:44:19,323 --> 00:44:24,294 Well, my records say that you're 93. 633 00:44:25,829 --> 00:44:27,331 How are you feeling? 634 00:44:28,198 --> 00:44:31,035 Oh, wait, now I remember. 635 00:44:31,168 --> 00:44:36,940 Ricky Ricardo and I did the salsa together one night. 636 00:44:38,308 --> 00:44:40,210 Ah. 637 00:44:44,214 --> 00:44:46,050 For how long? 638 00:44:46,183 --> 00:44:49,253 I don't know. My whole life, I guess. 639 00:44:49,420 --> 00:44:51,455 Maybe since Justin Timberlake. 640 00:44:51,789 --> 00:44:53,057 Ew! 641 00:44:53,190 --> 00:44:56,026 No, J.C. Chasez. 642 00:44:56,160 --> 00:44:58,128 No, are you kidding? He's totally gay. 643 00:44:58,262 --> 00:45:01,765 -No, he isn't. -Ha, ha, hello? Yes, he is. 644 00:45:02,166 --> 00:45:04,401 Are you sure you're not just making this up? 645 00:45:04,735 --> 00:45:06,437 About J.C. Chasez? 646 00:45:06,770 --> 00:45:11,308 No, about being gay. 647 00:45:12,076 --> 00:45:15,779 In this neighborhood? Why would I make that up? 648 00:45:16,447 --> 00:45:21,085 Look, you and Lip are the only two who know, all right? 649 00:45:21,218 --> 00:45:23,153 I won't tell anyone. 650 00:45:24,822 --> 00:45:26,290 Thanks. 651 00:45:26,924 --> 00:45:31,829 I thought maybe you were making this up so I'd call my brothers off, or... 652 00:45:31,962 --> 00:45:35,499 I don't know, maybe... 653 00:45:36,166 --> 00:45:39,269 ...you think I'm, like, ugly or something. 654 00:45:41,472 --> 00:45:45,175 Mandy, you're beautiful. 655 00:45:45,309 --> 00:45:47,444 This has nothing to do with the way you look. 656 00:45:47,778 --> 00:45:50,814 I'm just not wired that way. 657 00:46:01,492 --> 00:46:04,495 See? Nothing. 658 00:46:04,995 --> 00:46:07,764 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 659 00:46:08,165 --> 00:46:12,102 You can expect a visit from me every six months. 660 00:46:12,269 --> 00:46:16,039 Yeah, because this is such a great use of government funds. 661 00:46:16,173 --> 00:46:20,310 Hey. Maybe next time you can check that my Uncle Harold is taking his LIPITOR. 662 00:46:20,444 --> 00:46:23,981 Oh, wait, that's right, he doesn't get LIPITOR anymore... 663 00:46:24,114 --> 00:46:26,383 ...since you canceled his Medicare. 664 00:46:26,517 --> 00:46:30,320 Good thing I got some amigos down in Mexico. 665 00:46:30,454 --> 00:46:31,788 Here you are. 666 00:46:34,124 --> 00:46:37,227 Ninety-three, huh. She won't live long. 667 00:46:37,361 --> 00:46:39,129 Go. 668 00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:44,034 [FIONA GRUNTS] 669 00:46:44,168 --> 00:46:45,903 FRANK: Don't... Don't... -Wa-huh! 670 00:46:46,069 --> 00:46:48,906 -Now I can pay the gas bill. -No, no, no, wait, wait. 671 00:46:49,039 --> 00:46:51,275 Fiona, I'm serious. 672 00:46:55,145 --> 00:46:57,981 I also danced with Cab Calloway. 673 00:46:58,315 --> 00:47:03,086 He had the first colored penis I ever kissed. 674 00:47:09,259 --> 00:47:11,461 My work here is done. 675 00:47:11,595 --> 00:47:14,498 You're not going until we take her back to the nursing home. 676 00:47:14,831 --> 00:47:16,867 She's never heard of a bus pass? 677 00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:19,436 Aunt Ginger has to go back? 678 00:47:20,204 --> 00:47:23,173 Rice Krispie Treats, anyone? 679 00:47:23,574 --> 00:47:26,076 -Don't make her go. -She can't stay, Debs. 680 00:47:26,243 --> 00:47:28,979 But she didn't mean to pee in the plant. Please. 681 00:47:29,112 --> 00:47:30,981 She can't go back to the nursing home. 682 00:47:31,114 --> 00:47:33,483 I'll take care of her. I promise. 683 00:47:33,617 --> 00:47:35,085 She doesn't belong to us. 684 00:47:35,586 --> 00:47:38,222 Debs, you can come visit anytime you want. 685 00:47:38,355 --> 00:47:41,592 Besides, you can borrow her every six months. 686 00:47:41,925 --> 00:47:43,860 -Borrow what? -Aw, shit. 687 00:47:54,471 --> 00:47:57,074 FIONA: We should take Debs to visit the real Ginger's grave. 688 00:47:57,207 --> 00:47:58,609 Where's she buried? 689 00:47:59,476 --> 00:48:01,078 -Dad? -Huh? Huh? 690 00:48:03,413 --> 00:48:05,949 Um... 691 00:48:06,650 --> 00:48:08,085 Here. 692 00:48:08,218 --> 00:48:10,087 Wha...? 693 00:48:17,494 --> 00:48:19,997 I could pretend to be your girlfriend at school. 694 00:48:20,130 --> 00:48:22,499 Then no one would ever give you a hard time. 695 00:48:23,267 --> 00:48:24,468 You'd do that for me? 696 00:48:24,635 --> 00:48:28,972 Sure. It'll keep the creepy guys away from me. 697 00:48:29,139 --> 00:48:30,574 Besides... 698 00:48:32,009 --> 00:48:35,145 ...I've never actually had a real boyfriend before. 699 00:48:35,312 --> 00:48:38,949 Not that you'd be a real boyfriend but a boyfriend... 700 00:48:39,082 --> 00:48:40,617 -...I could do things with... -Heh. 701 00:48:40,951 --> 00:48:45,255 ...instead of, you know, just getting finger-banged all the time. 702 00:48:45,389 --> 00:48:47,124 [CHUCKLES] 703 00:48:56,266 --> 00:48:59,136 What a pretty little girl she is. 704 00:48:59,269 --> 00:49:01,471 -Rice Krispie Treats, anyone? -Debs, it's okay. 705 00:49:01,605 --> 00:49:04,508 -I got you. Okay. -Rice Krispie Treats? I made them. 706 00:49:04,675 --> 00:49:07,978 They're delicious. I really worked very hard. 707 00:49:08,145 --> 00:49:10,047 I'd appreciate it if you'd take one. 708 00:49:10,180 --> 00:49:12,015 Here, why don't you have some. 709 00:49:12,149 --> 00:49:14,051 -I know. OLD WOMAN: You ladies are so busy... 710 00:49:14,217 --> 00:49:15,952 ...you might get sticky fingers. 711 00:49:16,119 --> 00:49:18,322 He's pretty busy too. 712 00:49:18,455 --> 00:49:19,489 It's okay. I know. 713 00:49:19,623 --> 00:49:21,258 OLD WOMAN: Somebody wants my Rice Krispies. 714 00:49:21,391 --> 00:49:25,062 Oh, ladies. Oh, you're so talented. 715 00:49:27,731 --> 00:49:32,235 You go ahead if you're able enough to take one. 716 00:49:32,602 --> 00:49:35,639 And would you like one, sir? Oh, he looks pretty busy. 717 00:49:35,972 --> 00:49:38,308 FIONA: She's okay now. OLD WOMAN: Everyone's already busy. 718 00:49:40,043 --> 00:49:41,712 Ladies. 719 00:49:44,014 --> 00:49:46,116 Ahem, we came for a visit, she wasn't in her room. 720 00:49:46,249 --> 00:49:49,319 None of the staff knew where she was. 721 00:49:49,519 --> 00:49:52,989 WOMAN: After we called the police to file a missing person's report... 722 00:49:53,123 --> 00:49:57,160 ...she just walked through the front door as if nothing had happened. 723 00:49:58,228 --> 00:50:04,534 She keeps calling herself Abby and she says she'd like to ask us a few questions. 724 00:50:08,238 --> 00:50:11,575 It's so scary out there, Frank. 725 00:50:35,532 --> 00:50:38,168 Hey, above the covers. 726 00:50:38,769 --> 00:50:40,404 You got it. 727 00:50:41,238 --> 00:50:43,573 -You look nice. FIONA: Thank you. 728 00:50:52,282 --> 00:50:56,219 I got marshmallows for the ambrosia salad. 729 00:51:40,630 --> 00:51:42,232 Hey. 730 00:51:47,838 --> 00:51:48,872 Hey.